One of two things is going to happen here. Either you relax on your mission to become funnier and it works, or your relax, it doesn’t work out, and you have an easier time accepting it. It’s a win-win! Humor is innate in the sense that everybody is born with the ability to find things funny. At the same time, humor can also be learned. Even if you don’t have a sense of humor now, you can 100% acquire one. [2] X Research source
Wit – The ability to form clever or intelligent connections (“They’re the kind of person who has never used a word that might cause you to pick up a dictionary. ”) Dry humor – Humor based on extremely emotionless statements and ideas (“I don’t know if you know what that word ‘complicated’ means, but it’s very simple. ”) Sarcasm – Mockery that relies on exaggeration and irony (“They have a great vocabulary. Well, they may not know that word. ”) Physical humor – Comedy based on physical action, and often called slapstick (“You ever read one of these?” holds up dictionary) Dark humor – Comedy that treats taboo or serious subjects with levity (“They have the vocabulary of my grief counselor. And my grief counselor is dead. ”) Self-deprecating humor – Humor based on making fun of yourself (“I have no vocabulary, so I read the thesaurus. Now I’m smart, clever, intelligent, and academic. ” Puns – Humor based on turns of phrase have two meanings (“You should thank me for adding ‘plethora’ to your vocabulary. I’m sure it means a lot. ”) Surreal humor – Random, quirky, or nonsensical comedy (“You won’t find the word frumplous in the dictionary. Know why? It doesn’t exist. ”) Identifying what makes you laugh helps provide a roadmap to what your body naturally finds humorous.
This can take time, so try not to get frustrated if you feel like you aren’t picking up on things super quickly.
Watch popular comedic films and TV shows. If you’ve never watched standup comedy, give it a shot! Scan the trending tab on Youtube and look at what comedic videos people are watching. Some people simply prefer more literary comedy. Try reading the Sunday comics or browsing webcomics. It really helps to look up all the different styles of comedy out there. Understanding what exists and why it exists can help open up the reasoning behind why it’s funny (or why it isn’t).
Just surrounding yourself with people from different backgrounds can help dramatically. You’ll improve your sense of humor over time.
Revisit your favorite childhood games and interests. Play with modeling clay, mess around with a yo-yo, or break out your old board games and grab some friends. Embracing silliness and getting back in touch with your inner child can make it easier to loosen up and find the humor in things. Adults are socially conditioned to not be silly, goofy, or funny. If you can let go of those expectations for yourself, you can tap into your inner-funny and discover what your sense of humor truly is.
Laughter is medicine to the soul, and laughing often triggers more laughing. [9] X Trustworthy Source PubMed Central Journal archive from the U. S. National Institutes of Health Go to source Try letting yourself laugh out loud at slightly funny things and you may discover the real humor!
If you don’t get what was so funny, ask! There is absolutely nothing wrong with saying, “I don’t get it. ”
“I was going to wear my frog sandals today, but I was told this event had a policy against anything open-toad. ” “What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. ” “You know what kids these days play when their mom won’t let them use the phone? Bored games. ” “There are two types of people out there. Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data, and…”
Don’t give up. As frustrating as this may be, everybody has the ability to make progress and find their personal brand of humor. [13] X Research source If your partner doesn’t understand your sense of humor, try different kinds of jokes and wisecracks out until you find something they laugh at. Then, lean into more jokes in that style.
For example, if you trip in front of someone and they laugh, don’t get embarrassed. Instead, hop back up and bow like you’ve just performed a beautiful dismount.
Remember, you are valid and you are no less interesting or valuable just because you don’t think you have a sense of humor.
Rest assured that matching senses of humor actually aren’t essential for a healthy, happy relationship.
